A common misperception when considering a divorce in Oklahoma is that you need a lawyer. You can, in fact, settle the case on your own if it’s uncontested or with the help of a mediator if there are issues that you need to work through. 

Even in using a mediator, costs will be substantially lower than involving two attorneys. See here for guidance as to whether you have to go to court for an uncontested divorce.

The mediator intends to bring both parties to a mutual agreement with hopefully an intact, cordial relationship. A primary benefit is the spouses can say their peace on each critical component, plus everyone has a desire for a rapid process and to avoid a trial.

Ultimately, it’s in the couple’s best interest to have a third party as a mediator instead of attempting to negotiate between yourselves. Sometimes emotions can get in the way and send things off course, creating problems. It allows a peaceful and often more efficient option instead of messy and requiring your own legal team.

What Do You Need To File For a Divorce On Your Own in Oklahoma

As a couple planning to follow through with an uncontested divorce in Oklahoma, you can choose to handle the process yourselves when considering where to get a divorce in Oklahoma instead of opting for an attorney. An uncontested dissolution of marriage is one where each person agrees on the division of marital property. 

That doesn’t mean there won’t be challenges or be at all complex. Still, it can be less cumbersome than involving an attorney. Too often, with a lawyer on board, what should equate to a simple divorce can end up going to trial with excessive financial burdens and extended waiting times.

The county clerk’s office in the state advises of a few forms that you need for filing without a lawyer’s services. These might not ultimately encompass a full package but are the primary documents for an uncontested filing:

• Petition for divorce
• The waiver form
• The decree of divorce

Each form needs to be made in triplicate copy, but there will be easy-to-follow instructions. For those without children, these forms should suffice in handling marital property division, restoration of a spouse’s maiden name, and other provisions as needed.

There can be more complications with children and as details become more intricate, requiring more paperwork and a more challenging process. For those who find themselves struggling with heightened emotion and in maintaining their cordialness, it’s wise to let a professional mediate the disputes so that you can reach a civil resolution. 

Even with using these services, the cost should remain at a relatively reasonable amount. The suggestion is, without mediation, expenses could be as low as $2000 or less for a self-performed divorce proceeding. Find out how long dissolution of a marriage can take if uncontested at https://divorce.lovetoknow.com/how-long-does-uncontested-divorce-take#.

Do You Have A “Checklist” In Preparation

A large part of your success with the proceedings will depend on your capacity to introduce the appropriate documents with your packet and proof to support any claims pertaining to child support, alimony, marital asset division, or other essential issues.

Optimally, you want to ensure that you’re treated with fairness so that you can then have an opportunity to move forward in a good position when everything is final. 

Regardless of how complex, it’s vital to ensure you acquire all adequate information to accompany the forms to prevent any potential delays. Some things couples often neglect to consider:

• Individual Accounts:  If you haven’t already, you need to develop check/saving accounts in your name. The idea is to look for a savings account that offers high interest with no monthly fees. 

The suggestion is also that you apply for a credit card of your own which ultimately helps develop a rating for you alone.

• Credit Report: You should obtain a copy of your credit report, but aside from that, it’s to your benefit to register for a service that monitors your credit. These businesses will give you a notification if your ex tries to develop credit or run up debt in your name. The value is worth the investment.

• Make Your List: Produce a list that includes each liability and asset, including any reward points from your cards, memberships you hold, or any other perks that would deem as an asset.

Also, make sure to gather these together for your records:

• Pre/postnuptial agreements, if applicable
• Information concerning previous divorces
• Your and your Spouse’s employment information
• Your and your Spouse’s contact information and personal information
• Tax information for a specific number of years
• Banking information for a set period
• Proof of residency – Pull this link for residency guidelines in Oklahoma for filing a petition.
• Wedding details as to where/when took place
• Marriage therapist details
• Details of issues leading to divorce and grounds, if any
• “Domestic Partnership Certificate” if applicable (copy)
• Statement for social security (current)
• Separation Agreement
• Lifestyle expenses (that would include things like medical bills, etc.)
• Worksheet for monthly budget (creditor name, amount owed, and due date)
• Judgments
• Properties either party owns
• Inheritances
• Safety deposit box contents

If you’re not fully aware of the household finances, you will be since financial affidavits are part of the proceedings with everything disclosed. 

These steps mean to open the gate for the two of you. It can also perhaps help with mediation if you choose to use the assistance of a third party. That’s often beneficial for a more complex situation. Remember, organization prevents delays and can save money from having to resort to using lawyers’ services.

Why Divorce in Oklahoma Without A Lawyer 

Some couples considering divorce in Oklahoma choose to avoid the option of using a lawyer. The common thought process is that divorces can become complicated once lawyers become involved. Emotions are high already, especially when finances enter the picture. 

Typically, individuals hope to get the ideal representation to achieve the best settlement. Still, sometimes attorneys have a more aggressive approach towards the other party where a mediator or even the couple themselves would strive for a more reasonable tactic. 

While the perception leads you to believe you need a lawyer when filing for a divorce, there are benefits to going a different way. Some include:

• The expense of a lawyer in Oklahoma can be high.

The expectation is you’re supposed to get a lawyer when filing for a divorce, but that isn’t so. For those who have a relatively easy, straightforward process with nothing contested, you can handle the proceedings without the use of an attorney. 

The facts are that an attorney typically receives pay by the hour plus fees for each paper that passes their hands or phone call that they make. Regardless of the settlement, you might receive a hefty amount due to the lawyer adding to the emotional stress already being dealt with.

• The process will become an overly extended proceeding.

Everyone has a different divorce experience, with no one desiring it to drag out any longer than it has to. Unfortunately, with an attorney paid by the hour, their hope is for an extended proceeding, so there is more opportunity for them to gain a higher profit. 

More so than that, the professional, in some cases, will make an effort to take what might be an agreed-upon stance and turn the couple’s petition into a contested battle that ends up having to go to trial. 

The intentions are usually in the lawyer’s best interest and not so much the client, which often ends with extensive financial consequences for the individual parties.

• Ultimately there is a point where you lose control of the process.

At some point with negotiations, the lawyer gains control with you merely following the professional’s lead. Cordialness between the spouses is not genuinely a consideration once the lawyers take the reins. 

Typically, lawyers advise the parties when they have the situation under control while these “experts” bargain from attorney to attorney behind closed doors. The professionals assume they have an understanding of what their clients desire.

One thing critical for a participant to remember is that an attorney can be let go at any given point. There will still be fees, but less so, and if neither spouse feels good about the path the divorce is taking, it’s okay to cut ties. You will save from having continued costs add up and achieve a more pleasing outcome.  

• The relationship can turn ugly.

Many couples hope to maintain a sense of civility following the divorce. It can sometimes be challenging to maintain that cordial demeanor with a lawyer stirring up emotion in an attempt to dredge up a higher profit. 

In most cases, it can be more beneficial for couples to see how they do in negotiating issues themselves before seeking a third-party intervention.If you reach an impasse, a mediator can take over generally without either person losing a sense of cordialness towards each other. 

When hiring this service, the intention is to assist in resolving only the problems for which you can’t reach an agreement. There is no attempt to create more issues for you or extend the process. The mediator has similar goals in settling as quickly as possible to the satisfaction of everyone involved.

What Will You Need To File For A Divorce On Your Own in Oklahoma

As a couple planning to follow through with an uncontested divorce in Oklahoma, you can choose to handle the process yourselves. That doesn’t mean there won’t be challenges or that it won’t be complex, but it can be less cumbersome than involving an attorney. Too often, with a lawyer on board, the simple divorce can end up going to trial with excessive financial burdens and extended waiting times.

The county clerk’s office in the state advises a few forms that you need for filing without a lawyer’s services. They might not ultimately encompass a full package but are the primary documents for an uncontested filing:

• Petition for divorce
• The waiver form
• The decree of divorce

Each form needs copying in triplicate, but there will be easy-to-follow instructions. For those without children, these forms should suffice in handling marital property division, restoration of a spouse’s maiden name, and other provisions as needed.

There can be more complications with children, and the more intricate the things you have to divide, requiring more paperwork and a more challenging process. For those who find themselves struggling through heightened emotion and maintaining a level of cordialness, it’s wise to let a professional mediate the disputes so that you can reach a civil resolution. 

Even with using these services, the cost should remain at a relatively reasonable amount. Still, without using mediation, the suggestion is that amounts could be as low as $2000 or less for a self-done dissolution proceeding. 

Final Thought

Divorce isn’t easy for either person, regardless of who is pursuing the petition. If you struggle with the heightened emotions as the process progresses, make sure to seek individual counseling for your own mental health and lean on supportive friends and family. It’s not the time to be alone or show a face of strength. It’s okay to reach out.